finally over..

was just contemplating how so often we have only dreamt that this day would come sooner or later. yet when it finally arrives, its just a 'ok.... now what' kind of moment. then we slowly realise the freedom we have-like, seriously.

i dont know. mayb its just me being slow or something. but its taking me hours to realize i am in actual fact FREE. ok, not freedom in every sense of the word. but yes, free to sit and stone without feeling guilt, free to watch brainless cartoons without having the nagging to-do-list at the back of my mind, free to not even HAVE a to-do-list. basically, free to be aimless while choosing my own direction. know what i mean? nvm.

yes, i watched enchanted AGAIN. sorry la! i know its the kind of movie u just go like HAHA! but i cant help it and i actually thought a lot about it when i watched it the 1st time-no no. not about finding true love..- more like, my outlook of love and probably the "producer's" opinion of love. like i said, its not that i can help but think :) anyways, childhood things just dont get old- i think. hmmm... haha..

what should i do tmr? we'll see! ciao for now :)

Bad Day in History

So I thought I'd build a shield around my heart
In hope that all hurt shall depart.
Then to my horror I realized
I had no heart left to desensitize-
For you yourself had scoured it out,
Leaving behind a void-my crater of doubt.

back and gone and back and gone and back and gone....

its been such a long time and there is always so much inertia just to sign in. moreover, the recent past kinda formulates emotions too personal to publish out in the open. anyways, here i am! and I am guessin hardly a soul drops by here anymore. haha..

so, A levels are finally coming to a close. ok, 9 more days to go.. but only one paper! these few days have been spent relaxing and it tastes so so good. wahaha! *evil laughter* maybe i am slacking off more then i should. hmmm... OH WELL.. haha. seriously, i cannot wait for everything to be completely, totally, finally OVER. life has begun but it cannot really start till let paper 4 is over! so yes, i shall attempt to gear up into studying again =)

in retrospect, i've got a million things to thank God for. wait till thanksgiving!! haha.. kidding kidding. what i mean to say is that looking back at my 2 years in SA, it has proven to be so so so much more then expected. even to the very last moments He is blessing me with new and interesting experiences all the way.

one thing glory and i were talking about the other day was how it would seem that we have been extracted from our usual groups to study together and as a result even made "new friends". ok, maybe they are not COMPLETELY new. but we look around and realise how some people have been a part of out lives all this while but we've never really talked to them and stuff. yeah. its been a good time mugging.

and yes, i really am going to miss the mugging times we've all shared. the late stays in the library and cafe, and the milo plus coffee from the aunty at the malay stall. then there are the sunday study dates that are usually very "cozy" cos so few people turn up! haha.. no matter =) those times were great too.

one thing i've realised this year. memories are seriously crucial to me. its like, when i lost my photos because my SD card screwed up, i cried as if someone died. well, theoretically, my memories sort of died. that sounded silly to many but it really meant a lot to me and it was really depressing to realise it was all lost at once. so many photos and videos. heh. tech and me just dont go together. anyway, i learnt a valuable lesson- BACK UP ALL THE MEMORIES!!! ha.